Q: When can women make you a millionaire? A: When you're a billionaire.
A man driving a car hits a woman. Whose fault is it? The man's. Why was he driving in the kitchen?
Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a wedding cake.
Men have two emotions, hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.