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joke bank - Joke of the Day

Yo momma is so hairy, when she went to the movie theater to see Star Wars, everybody screamed and said, "IT'S CHEWBACCA!"

Today's Joke

Angel Stalone

Yo mama is so fat, the only thing from stopping her getting a big mac was the door.

Featured on May 24, 2018

Anonymous

When somebody calls you gay, say, "I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on."

Featured on May 23, 2018

Anonymous

Two blondes were trapped in an elevator. One was crying in the corner and the other one was shouting, ''HELP! HELP!" Then the one crying had an idea, ''Why don't we shout together?'' "Okay," said the other blonde. ''TOGETHER! TOGETHER!"

Featured on May 22, 2018

Gabriele

Q: How do you count cows?
A: With a cowculator.

Featured on May 21, 2018

Anonymous

Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many will you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2, how many will you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you 2 apples, and another 2 apples and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Featured on May 20, 2018

AliZ123

Three words to ruin a man's ego. "Is it in?"

Featured on May 19, 2018

ELIZETH

I made a terrible mistake the other night by renting a Tyler Perry movie. It was so bad that Redbox support called me the next day and offered me $20 just to keep it forever.

Featured on May 18, 2018

Paul Beisner