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joke bank - Joke of the Day

What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it's Halloween.

Today's Joke

Anonymous

Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?
A: You can see right through them.

Featured on October 30, 2014

Capricorn37

Q: What kind of candy do Indians give out on Halloween?
A: Dots.

Featured on October 29, 2014

Tyler Harrison

Yo mama is so fat on Halloween she threw on a white sheet and went as Antarctica.

Featured on October 28, 2014

olaf the unicorn!

Q: What did the Black Eyed Peas do at Wiz Khalifa's costume party?
A: They dressed up in black and yellow, black and yellow, and said, "I'm a bee, I'm a bee, I'm a I'm a I'm a bee!"

Featured on October 27, 2014

Anonymous

Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?

Featured on October 26, 2014

jewelzee86

Q: Why did the pig leave the costume party?
A: Because everyone thought he was a boar.

Featured on October 25, 2014

Anonymous

A chicken walks into a library, goes up to a librarian and says, "Book book book." The librarian decides that the chicken wants a book so he gives the chicken a book and the chicken walks away. About ten minutes later the chicken comes back with the book, looking a bit agitated, saying, "Book book book." The librarian decides the chicken wants another book so he takes the old book back and gives the chicken another book. The chicken walks out the door. Ten minutes later the chicken comes back again, very agitated, saying, "Book book book!" so quickly it almost sounds like one word. The chicken puts the book on the librarians desk and looks up - waiting for another book. This time the librarian gives the chicken another book and decides that something weird is happening. He follows the chicken out the door and into the park, all the way to the pond. In the pond is a frog sitting on a lily pad. The chicken gives the book to the the frog, who then says, "Reddit, reddit."

Featured on October 24, 2014

Under41