Q: How can you get a blonde to laugh on Saturday?
A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Two rednecks were walking along when they saw a dog licking its balls. The first redneck said, "I wish I could do that." The other redneck said, "You dumbass, he would bite you."
Featured on April 23, 2014
I've spent the last two years looking for my wife's killer, but nobody will do it.
Featured on April 22, 2014
A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over the policeman says, "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The man gets really indignant and says, "Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"
Featured on April 21, 2014
Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket? He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
Featured on April 20, 2014
Q: What did Osama Bin Laden's ghost say to Mitt Romney? A: "Don't be sad, Obama's foreign policy killed me too"
Featured on April 19, 2014
Three nuns are talking. The first nun says, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines." "What did you do?" the other nun asks. "Well, of course I threw them in the trash." The second nun says, "Well, I can top that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms!" "Oh my!" gasp the other nuns. "What did you do?" they ask. "I poked holes in all of them!" she replies. The third nun faints.
Featured on April 18, 2014
Cannibal #1: "I can't stand my mother-in-law."
Cannibal #2: "Why don't you just eat the vegetables?"
Featured on April 17, 2014