Why don't witches wear panties? So they can get a better grip on the broom!
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?
A: Santa stops after three hos.
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it's Halloween.