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joke bank - Boycott These Jokes

Three ladies were on a flight, when suddenly the captain announced, "Please prepare for a crash landing." The first lady put on all her jewelry. Surprised by this, the other ladies questioned her actions. The first lady replied, "Well, when they come to rescue us they will see that I am rich, and will rescue me first." The second lady, not wanting to be left behind, began to take off her top and bra. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, when they come to rescue us, they will see my great t*ts and will take me first." The third lady who was African, not wanting to be outdone, took off her pants and panties. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, they always search for the black box first."

paigelady

Jesus walks into a inn, hands the innkeeper three nails, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"

william th...

Q: What do elephants use for tampons?
A: Sheep.

mgrector

Have you heard? Michael Jackson’s last wish was that his body be turned into Legos. So little kids can play with him. It turns out this wish hasn’t been difficult to implement, as his body was already 99% plastic.

dolpn26

Why is it that skinny men like fat women? Because they need warmth in winter and shade in summer.

ADRIANA89

Q: What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A: A rip off.

BlackManBlack

Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.

BlackKeebler

How do you know if a guy has a high sperm count? She has to chew before she swallows.

aah12000

Q: What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bath tub?
A: Throw in some laundry.

Mark My Words

After being married for twenty years to his lover, a gay man dies. When the funeral arrangements have been set, the widower approaches the undertaker with a peculiar request, "I know we had plans to cremate his body, but will you please chop him up and put him in a extra spicy curry instead?" The undertaker asks, "Why would you want that?" The gay widower replies, "So he will blow my ass out one more time."

every one

Ever seen a blind man swim? He probably hasn't either.

alycatnme

A child and a child molester walk into a forest together. The child turns to the molester and says, "Boy, these woods are scary." The molester says to the child, "You think you're scared? I have to walk out of here alone."

Colemcfarl...